Let’s be honest, life can be stressful sometimes! Whether it’s stress caused from work expectations, relationship struggles, health challenges, and everything in between, it quickly takes a toll on our wellbeing. That’s why it’s so important to learn how to destress!
Here you’ll find some of my favorite ways to relax and unwind after experiencing long periods of stress.
I hope you find them as helpful as I have! 🙂
Mindfulness to Destress
Anyone who’s experienced chronic stress knows the struggle of feeling like you can never fully relax. There is always some form of low-grade tension existing in your body. I often carry stress in my neck and shoulders which gives me awful tension headaches.
You may find that your chest feels tight or you can’t quite reach that full satisfying breath. Maybe anxiety rears it’s ugly head during periods of stress. If that’s the case click here for some easy and free ways to work through anxiety and panic attacks.
If you feel like you can’t fully let go I recommend you start with mindfulness! It’s one of the best and easiest ways to learn how to destress.
This is an excellent tool I learned reading The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk. If you or someone you know has experienced trauma or chronic stress this is a must read! You can purchase it here.
Step 1: Notice your physical sensations
Find someplace quiet where you won’t be easily distracted and begin taking slow deep breaths. Starting at the top of your head take a mental scan of how your body feels. Are your brows furrowed? Your shoulders scrunched into your ears? Maybe your jaw is clenched?
Continue taking mental notes as you move down your body. Through your chest, stomach, arms and so forth.
Sometimes it can help to follow along to a guided body scan. Especially if you struggle with wandering thoughts! There are SO many great options on YouTube and they’re completely free! And who doesn’t want low cost options as you learn how to destress in this economy!
Step 2: Name the sensations
Now that you’ve become aware of how your body feels, take time to actually label the sensations. For example, “When I feel stressed, my shoulders feel tight and uncomfortable.” This brings you further into a state of mindfulness and allows you to safely understand what is happening in your body.
Step 3: Connect your thoughts and sensations
The feelings of stress and reactions we have don’t come from nowhere. There is an interplay between outside stimulation and the way our bodies process it internally.
We’ve all experienced this to one degree or another. If someone raises their voice or yells it can startle us or create a strong emotional response. They may have not physically forced a reaction but your brain registered their anger as a threat and lit up your nervous system. Your heart begins racing, your palms get clammy, and your breathing speeds up.
In the same way, our thoughts can cause physical reactions inside our body. Have you ever heard the saying that our brains can’t tell the difference between reality and imagination? While that’s not 100% correct there is a lot of truth to it still. Our brains are normally pretty effective at distinguishing between real and fake. The issue lies when the imagined scenario/thought becomes strong and vivid. This leads our brain to react as if the thoughts we’re having are real. Dr Dijkstra of UCL says, “…there is no categorical difference between imagination and reality; instead, it is a difference in degree, not in kind.”
Basically, this is a long-winded way of saying your thoughts matter! They have a huuuge impact on your overall health and hold a lot of power.
Oftentimes we struggle to identify the thoughts behind our feelings of stress. In our distraction filled world rarely are we alone with our thoughts. We listen to music or podcasts on the drive to work, we juggle several tasks at our jobs, we scroll every free moment, and we often have multiple screens on all at once. Leaving little room to think about our thoughts and emotions until we’re laying in bed and the racing thoughts won’t leave us alone.
Get Undistracted
As you’re noticing and naming the sensations try to rewind your thoughts a little. Analyze what has been happening in your mind when you started feeling the way you are. Maybe lies came into your mind…”I’ll never be enough”…”Nobody loves me”…”I’m stuck like this”…”Does anybody even see me? Do they care?”
Or perhaps you were doom scrolling and watched something tragic. A news alert flashed across your screen of more lives that have been lost. Somebody’s child ran away from home. Another marriage left broken from infidelity.
Identify what thought jumped into your mind and you have been given one of the best weapons to fight against your stress.
Step 3: Combat The Lies
I am not naturally one to argue, but when my mind gets filled will all sorts of lies and fears I have to fight back. I highly encourage you to do the same!
Scripture will be your greatest weapon here! Take every thought and emotion to the word of God and fact check it. If it doesn’t line up, chuck it! Just like what Paul says in Philippians 4:8-9, we should think on things that are true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, and commendable.
It will take effort and daily practice but I promise that over time you will notice a huge difference in your thought life!
Move your body to Destress
Sometimes it takes sweating out that stress to really get you feeling better. If lifting weights is something you enjoy and is realistic for you than give that a go! other options are to Go for a run, walk around your neighborhood, or my personal favorite – Pilates!
This is my favorite form of exercise as it feels best for my body and brain. I feel energized afterwards rather than beat down. Plus it doesn’t elevate your cortisol (a hormone that plays a huge role in you feeling stressed) which is a major bonus! It’s also super accessible and doesn’t require any equipment or a gym membership, while still being incredibly effective!
If you’re looking for faith based Pilates I highly recommend Callie Gualy and her app Sweaty Studio! Her app is super affordable and offers thousands of workouts tailored to your unique needs.
She also has two YouTube channels where you can get free workouts that are amazing! Click here for her main channel with a variety of content and workouts. Or click here for her faith specific workouts from her in person studio called Sunshine Pilates!
Both are amazing and I can’t recommend her enough!
The most important thing when it comes to exercise is finding something you love. Fitness is not one size fits all! Pick something that challenges and encourages you. And don’t buy into the lie that exercise has to be painful and hard. Remember, we’re trying to learn how to destress, not add stress! Make it fun and rewarding, you got this!
Remember! Give yourself grace
This journey is hard and will take some time for you to feel completely better. So give yourself buckets full of grace to do things imperfectly. God doesn’t expect perfection, why should you?
If your mind wanders during meditation, give yourself grace. You’re not doing it wrong, you just have thoughts. That’s normal and human.
If you just can’t muster up the energy to engage in healthy habits so you scroll during your free time, give yourself grace. Sometimes we need a break from working and fighting for our minds. That’s okay, tomorrow is a new day to settle back in.
I have learned that getting frustrated with myself for not improving instantly or falling back into unhealthy habits only leads to more stress and shame. It’s okay to cut yourself some slack sis, you’ve got a lot going on! Talk to yourself like you would to a best friend. Be kind and gentle 🙂
I hope these methods helped you learn how to destress!
You got this my girls!
XOXO
Lily